1. You open your closet. What brands of clothes do you see?
Chanel, Gucci, Prada
Gap, Abercrombie and Fitch, American Eagle
Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, Casual Corner
Wal-mart, K-mart, Target
Who cares?

2. Where would be the ideal place to get it on?
Secluded beach
Backseat of a Jaguar
Treetops
In your bed
Get what on?

3. You're walking down the street and you see a blind man who has lost his cane. What do you do?
Call for help on your styling Nokia
Go and help the poor guy retrieve his cane
Steal his wallet
Circumcise him
Nothing... it's too much trouble to leave the house

4. The cops have kicked down your door and have busted you for possession of Cocaine! You...
Tear off your clothes and try to seduce them
Put a gun to your head
Run for your life and disguise yourself as a mannequin
Offer them exploding Krispy Kreme donuts
Admit what a bad little girl you have been and apologize

5. Which one of these magazines would you want if you were put away for 25-life?
Spin
Rolling Stone
Entertainment Weekly
Martha Stewart Living
Maxim Blender

6. You're going to have a baby girl! Congratulations! But what do you name her?
Freesia
Emily
Shakira
Mocha
...I'm sterile.

7. What are you doing in your spare time?
Volunteering for charity
Playing solitaire and mindsweeper
We're talking dominatrix, baby!
Downloading warez off the internet
It's all about raving and fucking!

8. Your uncle died and you've inherited some money! You decide to use it as a down payment on a new car. What do you get?
Jaguar
Explorer
Dodge Ram
A bus
I don't like driving. I'll buy CDs instead.

9. How would you describe your friend relationships?
I have a few close friends
Does my church group count?
I don't have any friends
Let's ask my buddy George
I'm too popular to remember everyone

10. You're watching TV because you have nothing better to do. What are you watching?
The Young and the Restless
Blue's Clues
Friends
The X-Files
Alias

11. Now it's time to say goodbye to all our company!
See ya!
M-I-C...
M'k! Buh-bye!
...K-E-Y...
¡Adios chiquito!
Bye.
M-O-U-S-E!!!!!